Star One Smart Blog's

Spotted these at Theo Spark's house this morning.

Dear American liberals, leftists, social progressives, socialists, Marxists, Obama supporters, et al:

We have stuck together since the late 1950's, but the whole of this latest election process has made me realize that I want a divorce. I know we tolerated each other for many years for the sake of future generations, but sadly, this relationship has run its course. Our two ideological sides of America cannot and will not ever agree on what is right, so let's just end it on friendly terms. We can smile, slate it up to irreconcilable differences, and go our own ways.

Here is a model dissolution agreement:

Our two groups can equitably divide up the country by landmass each taking a portion. That will be the difficult part, but I am sure our two sides can come to a friendly agreement. After that it should be relatively easy! Our respective representatives can effortlessly divide other assets since both sides have such distinct and disparate tastes. We don't like redistributive taxes so you can keep them. You are welcome to the liberal judges and the ACLU.

Since you hate guns and war, we'll take our firearms, the cops, the NRA, and the military. You can keep Oprah, Michael Moore, and Rosie O'Donnell (you are however, responsible for finding a bio-diesel vehicle big enough to move them).

We'll keep the capitalism, greedy corporations, pharmaceutical companies, Wal-Mart, and Wall Street. You can have your beloved homeless, homeboys, hippies, and illegal aliens. We'll keep the hot Alaskan Hockey Moms, greedy CEO's, and Rednecks. We'll keep the Bibles and give you NBC and Hollywood.

You can make nice with Iran, Palestine, and France, and we'll retain the right to invade and hammer places that threaten us. You can have the peaceniks and war protesters. When our allies or way of life are under assault, we'll provide them job security.

We'll keep our Judeo-Christian Values. You are welcome to Islam, Scientology, Humanism, and Shirley McClain. You can have the U.N. but we will no longer be paying the bill. We'll keep the SUV's, pickup trucks, and oversized luxury cars. You can take every Subaru Station Wagon you can find.

You can give everyone healthcare, if you can find any practicing Doctors (that is practicing, Howard Dean) who will follow to your turf (sic). We'll continue to believe healthcare is a luxury and not a right.

We'll keep The Battle Hymn of the Republic and The National Anthem. I'm sure you'll be happy to substitute Imagine, I'd Like to Teach The World To Sing, Kum Ba Ya, or We Are the World.

We'll practice trickle down economics, and you can give trickle up poverty its best shot.

Since it often so offends you we'll keep our History, our Name, and our Flag.

Would you agree to this?

In the spirit of friendly parting, I'll bet you ANWAR on who will need whose help in 15 years.

Sincerely,
John J. Wall
Law Student
American

P.S. Please take Barbra Streisand.

P.P.S. We will keep all oil rigs offshore, all oil refineries, all big oil companies and exploration teams. You can keep your windmills and solar panels.

Sure, it's funny and not meant to be taken seriously. But it's funny because there's nibblets of truth embedded in the message.

What would our far-left liberals do without the means of capitalism, of production? How would they re-distribute wealth if they were bereft of the infrastructure provided to them by capitalism? How long would the neo-socialist nation left-proggs are so desirous of stay intact, without the bedrock values provided by the no-nonsense patriots who actually made this country great?

I find many of the left to be much like embedded parasites, forever clinging and dependent on the host-organism's health and sustained vigor. Now, the parasites are of such quantity and size that the host is threatened. Look it up: parasites what kill the host eventually fail shortly thereafter, unless there's a new host nearby. A command economy and bread lines won't be much of a host, after these years of suckling away at the world's best economy.

I don't think far-lefty parasites could 'make it' without the strength of true American capitalism and the infrastructure that capitalism has provided. That's why Barack Obama is going to disappoint so many of 'em, because he doesn't want to be responsible for bringing down that which gave him such an easy life.

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